I love Crete!

Greek Style

If you flush toilet paper down the toilet beware the trident of Poseidon!

Look what followed us home

Train disruptions, metro closures. Lady Luck sent us an American Greek! As we made our way to the port (Nikki and I went to Hydra for the weekend) via a series of public transport disasters good ol James asked for directions and took us where we needed to be. James. James who travels in his sleeping bag so he can pull it over his head and be in his own nest. James who brushes his teeth in McDonalds. James who promised me a tour of Athens that got rained on. Good ol crazy James who tried to trick me with a chocolate chip cookie, that aint no dagga cookie James! I planned to eat it to prove he was lying but the Albanian bitches who cleaned our room in Hydra stole it.....!

Edward Maya - Stereo Love

George you're a legend!!!

I'll just have a glass of water thanks

In Greece, it is assumed that you know what you want to order without having had a look at the menu. Requests for a menu are met by a grumble and followed by crappy service from that point on. How the flip am I supposed to know what I want to order if I dont know what you serve?!?
*menu arrives*

Huh? What is Water Ice? That's like saying Hot Cold or Up Down... aah dont you just love Greek Engrish? Good thing I can read greek, poor tourists. *stares blankly at the greek writing* So a Water Ice is a granite? erm, what? Turns out its actually a Slush Puppie *shrugs her shoulders*

A sign of Civilisation!

I've been staying at the xorio (my parents village). It's the land of all things creepy - spiders, scorpions, parktown prawn looking grasshoppers, big black bugs with fangs *shudders*. The xorio is tucked away on a mountain (its a 1.4km walk to the main road), 45 mins drive either way to a big town. Its in the middle of nowhere. The internet connection here is slooooooooooow. Everyone has their own vegetable garden. The 'restaurant' serves chickens from the priests garden. The doctor only visits once a week. The man who delivers bread only visits once a week.
Anyhoo, I decided to be homely this morning and fry some eggs (okay fine my mom left and I was starving). I tried not to think about the fact that tonight I may very well be eating the chickens bum that laid the eggs. I opened the fridge, what's that?! Stamped eggs?? Stamped eggs!! There is a God and he knows where our xorio is! Stamped eggs = fat chickens I wont be eating + washed eggs + expiry date + no trace of villageness

Sexy Love

This song is rocking my world!

No thanks, I'll walk

WTF?? Is this the tug-boat for Noah's Ark?

Ploutarxos - Eisai uperoxi

>

If I had a rock...

KAZAAAAAAAM!! The ducks are fucked

Jesus was a black man

At the Byzantine Monastery of Panayia Mavriotissa in Kastoria there is an icon depicting Mother Mary and Jesus with dark skin, also called the Black Madonna. Erm thats pretty much all I learnt about churchy stuff today, I got distracted by a big tree while the priest was explaining

Nikki and Niko

My lovely friend Nikki is coming to visit me from London, we decided to spend the weekend in Hydra. Nikki is one of those people who needs to be organised and wants to have everything in order way in advance. She has been nagging me to get a confirmation letter (for visa purposes) from the hotel we will be staying at (www.hydroussahotel.gr), but I've had limited internet access for the last two weeks so it hasnt gotten done yet. Spoke to Niko today and asked him to mail Nikki what she needs, he asked if he could play a little joke on her, "Nikki will kill me!!!!"

I soon received an e-mail from a very flustered Nikki in response to the mail Niko had sent her:

Dear Mrs. Botha,

We would like to inform you that your booking is confirmed.
We reserve a room for the dates 15th of August until 19th of August.
Everything will be as you asked.
On the airport, you will have transport service. A car of our company with a couple of extremely professional strippers will make your way to the port more convenient.
Arriving at Hydra, be careful cause a coloured man will be waiting for you...he will accompany you at the hotel singing all the time Bob Marley.
At the hotel, your "Godfather" will be in his office where you can give him all the guns, the bombs and the drugs he ordered, don't forget to give him also a t-shirt from London.

We will be at your disposal for any further information or request.

Kind regards,

Nikos Karabikas
Hydroussa hotel, resort and spa

p.s. a couple of nice bikini photos could easily make your stay more convenient.

Niko is a Good Boy!!!

Greek Engrish and oh-so-gay shirts

All the boys are wearing sparkly shirts, not just a sparkle here and there, really really ridiculously sparkly shirts! I may be wrong but I just dont see straight South African boys following this trend (I hope I'm wrong, the clubbing scene here is so fabulous, sparkly shirts dancing all around, its like a disco ball on steroids!)

Computer Wizardry

So my ultra portable fab laptop has suffered quite a bit in Greece, maybe its the change of scenery but I've had non stop hassles with it since I got here. Its been in for repairs on a regular basis.


Maybe I shouldnt let wives of cousins remove stuck memory cards with a knife.....