Thursday, 2 August 2012

Nelly says

You think I talk a lot. You haven't met Nelly. I am one of those annoying people that insists on chit chatting with the passenger next to me on flights, I met my match. I will chit chat for the first hour or so but once the dinner service has been completed leave me alone so I can sleep. Not Nelly. She jabbered on and on and on, right through dinner, right through the night. I wasn't offering any conversation other than " oh okay, yes, no, wow, soooooo interesting", and all my face was saying was "SNORE!!!!!", at least that was what it was trying to say, I need more Botox.

As annoying as it was Nelly was actually very entertaining . She came up with some pearlers:
- "You know how Jamaican girls dance so sexy? Well they are terrible in bed! They look like they will be wild in bed but they just lie there,"
- "Caster Semenya is a man. Definitely. Didn't you see at the Olympic Games opening ceremony she was carrying the flag? That's a man's job! That's why they put her to carry it. She's a man"
- "I'm 8 weeks pregnant and my 3 year old son knew before me. He started becoming obsessed with my boobs and always putting his hands down my shirt. I said what's wrong with you Bradley but you see he knew there was someone in there" ........if someone is in your boobs we have problems Nelly.

She was actually very funny, I wish I wasn't feeling tired and fluey on that flight, if I had been on top form I'm sure Nelly and I would have been kicked off the flight for disturbing the peace!

Hey Next Door Passenger on my return flight, you have big shoes to fill. Big clown shoes.


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